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Steel Panther – All You Can Eat [Review]


Steel Panther – All You Can Eat
2014, Open E Entertainment
Buy the album at

1. Pussywhipped
2. Party Like Tomorrow Is the End of the World
3. Gloryhole
4. Bukkake Tears
5. Gangbang at the Old Folks Home
6. Ten Strikes You’re Out
7. The Burden of Being Wonderful
8. Fucking My Heart in the Ass
9. B.V.S
10. You’re Beautiful When You Don’t Talk
11. If I Was King
12. She’s On the Rag

Michael Starr – lead vocals, backing vocals
Satchel – lead, rhythm and acoustic guitars, backing vocals
Lexxi Foxxx – bass guitar, backing vocals
Stix Zadinia – drums, percussion, piano, backing vocals

Additional Musicians:
Vivian Campbell – Guitar (“Gangbang at the Old Folks Home”)

Steel Panther continues to prowl the streets with their special satiric blend of heavy metal, melodic rock, sex and gross-out humor. All You Can Eat delivers some of the band’s best songs to date with some interesting musical choices. “Pussywhipped” begins with an acoustic intro that sounds a bit ominous, I half expected the band to break out into 1980s-era thrash song while the keyboards portions used in “She’s On the Rag” sound like they could have very well come from a Lady GaGa song.

For my money, Steel Panther is one of the best rock/metal bands around. Not only are they funny but they are great musicians and songwriters. Pop, heavy metal, glam… it doesn’t matter. They do it and do it well (and I’m not just talking about having sex). Though the band already has some great songs in their catalog, this is probably their best record to date. I can’t get “The Burden of Being Wonderful”, “You’re Beautiful When You Don’t Talk”, “Bukkake Tears” or “She’s On the Rag” out of my head. In fact, I’ve had to correct myself at work because I’ve found myself mumbling the lyrics on a number of occasions. And trust me, “Bukkake Tears” and “She’s On the Rag” are two songs you don’t want to sing aloud unless you want a visit from HR!

Even so, “Bukkake Tears” and “The Burden of Being Wonderful” are two of my favorite songs of the year. They are nothing short of modern pop-metal masterpieces. I realize some people many not be accepting of that given the lyrics, but that’s how I feel. If these guys toned down the humor for one album, they’d probably deliver one of the best hair metal albums of all time. Even with the humor, they are still delivering some of the best hair metal albums. Filler tracks here would be “B.V.S.” (which stands for Big Vagina Syndrome) and “Ten Strikes You’re Out”.

All You Can Eat is an extremely fun album with great riffs and catchy choruses for days. Gonna be tough to beat this one at the end of the year.

Highlights: “Pussywhipped”, “Party Like Tomorrow Is the End of the World”, “Gloryhole”, “Bukkake Tears”, “The Burden of Being Wonderful”, “You’re Beautiful When You Don’t Talk”, “She’s On the Rag”

The Metal Excess Awards: 2011 Edition

Last year I said 2010 was a better year for music than 2009 was. I went on to wonder how 2011 could even begin to top it. Well, guess what… 2011 did indeed top 2010! I’m looking back at my Top 25 list for 2010 and while those albums are all still good, this year’s Top 25 list is much stronger top to bottom.

2011 was a great year that saw classic rock/metal acts like Whitesnake, Warrant, Riot, Alice Cooper, Journey, Black N’ Blue and King Kobra deliver some of the best albums of their career while younger acts like Steel Panther, Reckless Love, Savage Messiah, Evile (who missed the list by this much) and Black Veil Brides have shown that they are more than capable of carrying rock & metal into the future.

Top 25 Albums of 2011

1. Whitesnake – Forevermore
2. Sixx:A.M. – This Is Gonna Hurt
3. Riot – Immortal Soul
4. Warrant – Rockaholic
5. Alice Cooper – Welcome 2 My Nightmare
6. Steel Panther – Balls Out
7. Megadeth – Thirteen
8. Anthrax – Worship Music
9. Sebastian Bach – Kicking & Screaming
10. Reckless Love – Animal Attraction
11. Edguy – Age of the Joker
12. Hurtsmile – s/t
13. Journey – Eclipse
14. Chickenfoot – III
15. Mike Tramp & The Rock ‘N’ Roll Circuz – Stand Your Ground
16. Black Country Communion – 2
17. The Poodles – Performocracy
18. House of Lords – Big Money
19. King Kobra – s/t
20. Saliva – Under Your Skin
21. Foo Fighters – Wasting Light
22. Black N’ Blue – Hell Yeah!
22. Savage Messiah – Plague of Conscience
24. George Lynch – Kill All Control
25. Joe Bonamassa – Dust Bowl

Best E.P./Single
In light of a few non-album singles being released this year, I’ve decided to make this a hybrid category.

1. Sixx:A.M. – 7
2. Black Veil Brides – Rebels
3. Who Cares – Out of My Mind / Holy Water
4. Wildstreet – II …Faster …Louder!
5. The Last Vegas – The Other Side E.P.

Best Compilation/Cover/Live/Reissue Albums
Kind of a catch-all category this year. Instead of listing each category individually, I decided to lump them all into one list and rank them that way.

1. Black Sabbath – Born Again [Deluxe Edition]
2. Stryper – The Covering
3. Vains of Jenna – Reverse Tripped
4. Whitesnake – Live at Donington 1990
5. Slash featuring Myles Kennedy – Live: Made In Stoke 24/7/11
6. Hell – Human Remains
7. Scorpions – Comeblack
8. Def Leppard – Mirrorball: Live & More
9. Eric Carr – Unfinished Business
10. Black Sabbath – Dehumanizer [Deluxe Edition]

Want to read more about the year in music? Check out some of the fine sites & blogs listed below! And be sure to keep checking back for more Year-End posts here at Metal Excess!

All Metal Resource —

Bring Back Glam —

The Crash Pad of Ray Van Horn, Jr. –

Hair Metal Mansion —

Hard Rock Hideout —

Hard Rock Nights —

Heavy Metal Addiction —

Heavy Metal Time Machine —

Imagine Echoes —

Layla’s Classic Rock —

Metal Odyssey —

The Ripple Effect —

Steel Panther – Balls Out

Steel Panther – Balls Out (2011, Universal Republic Records)

1. “In The Future” … 1:28
2. “Supersonic Sex Machine” … 3:10
3. “Just Like Tiger Woods” … 3:41
4. “17 Girls In A Row” … 3:41
5. “If You Really, Really Love Me” … 2:25
6. “It Won’t Suck Itself” … 2:54
7. “Tomorrow Night” … 2:58
8. “Why Can’t You Trust Me” … 4:01
9. “That’s What Girls Are For” … 3:59
10. “Gold-Digging Whore” … 3:55
11. “I Like Drugs” … 4:19
12. “Critter” … 3:38
13. “Let Me Come In” … 3:30
14. “Weenie Ride” … 4:20

Michael Starr – Lead Vocals, Backing Vocals
Satchel – Lead Guitar, Backing Vocals
Lexxi Foxxx – Bass, Backing Vocals
Stix Zadinia – Drums, Backing Vocals

Additional Musicians:
Chad Kroger – Vocals (“It Won’t Suck Itself”)
Dane Cook – Spoken Words (“In The Future”)

Producer: Jay Ruston

The mighty Steel Panther has returned with another round of heavy metal parody. What’s great about these guys is that while they certainly have the glam-metal mimbo image down pat, these guys can actually get pretty heavy when they want to. Just check out “Death To All But Metal” from Feel The Steel or this album’s “Supersonic Sex Machine” (which apes Judas Priest’s “Rapid Fire” quite well). As far as musicianship goes, these guys are no joke.

There’s a bit of a trade-off with this album in comparison to Feel The Steel. FTS had funnier songs (“Asian Girl”, “Death To All But Metal”, “Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin'”, “Community Property”) but I think overall Balls Out is a much more consistent listen. And this is coming from someone who LOVED Feel The Steel! I’m not sure if the joke has played itself out or what, maybe it’s a case of “been there, done that” but I wasn’t as entertained by the lyrics this time.

Don’t get me wrong, the lyrics are humorous and still a big part of Steel Panther’s charm. They are, after all, a parody and you get the overly sexist lyrics that belittle women (seventeen women if you believe Michael’s tale in “17 Girls in a Row”) with references to anal sex, oral sex, gold diggers, “weenie rides”, drugs and masturbation while asking important questions like “Why can’t you trust me?”

Musically, their style hasn’t changed a bit. It’s glam, it’s hard rock, it’s heavy metal! Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Van Halen, Motley Crue, Warrant, Poison, Ratt, etc. are still the main influences and Satchel gets to show off just how much of a monster he is with his guitar. There’s some filler such as “Weenie Ride” and “I Like Drugs” but overall this is a very strong rock/metal release that puts it near the top of the pack for 2011.

Highlights: “Supersonic Sex Machine”, “Just Like Tiger Woods”, “17 Girls In A Row”, “It Won’t Suck Itself”, “If You Really, Really Love Me”, “Critter”

Buy ‘Balls Out’ at

The Best Albums of the 2000s

Welcome to 2010!

I’m going to start the year off with yet another list except I won’t be limiting myself to “Top 10” or “Top 20” or whatever. I’ll be going chronologically, year by year (I didn’t put the albums in any specific order though) and if I thought it was a really good album, I’ll list it regardless of whether one year has four albums listed and another year only has two.

Looking back, the whole decade was pretty good for this rock/metal fan. The scene suffered greatly during the ’90s, but by 2000, the genre was turning the corner and I think most people had grown tired of depressed drug addicts and angry no-talent white rappers playing rock music. The legends were laying low during the ’90s and the next decade was made up of many comebacks, but that’s not to discount many newer acts who stepped up and played a vital role in rock ‘n’ roll.

Marvelous 3 – ReadySexGo
Halford – Resurrection
Bon Jovi – Crush
Cold – 13 Ways to Bleed on Stage
The Union Underground – …An Education in Rebellion
Alice Cooper – Brutal Planet

Puddle of Mudd – Come Clean
Megadeth – The World Needs a Hero
Alice Cooper – Dragontown
Lit – Atomic

Dio – Killing the Dragon
Butch Walker – Left of Self-Centered
Bon Jovi – Bounce
Sentenced – The Cold White Light
L.A. Guns – Waking the Dead

Anthrax – We’ve Come For You All
Alice Cooper – The Eyes of Alice Cooper
Dream Evil – Evilized

Scorpions – Unbreakable
Megadeth – The System Has Failed
Tesla – Into the Now
Dream Evil – The Book of Heavy Metal
Brides of Destruction – Here Come the Brides

Judas Priest – Angel of Retribution
Alice Cooper – Dirty Diamonds

Edguy – Rocket Ride
Paul Stanley – Live to Win

Avenged Sevenfold – Avenged Sevenfold
Sebastian Bach – Angel Down
Scorpions – Humanity: Hour I

Guns N’ Roses – Chinese Democracy
Edguy – Tinnitus Sanctus
Whitesnake – Good to Be Bad

KISS – Sonic Boom
Steel Panther – Feel the Steel

The Top 10 Albums of 2009

It was pretty tough for me to come up with a top ten for this year. There were so many good releases in 2009, but only a handful of them were special so I changed my mind quite a bit when coming up with this list. 2009 seemed to be the year of the “grower”. Meaning, many albums on this list (and many others that I liked that didn’t make this list), didn’t grab me at first but upon repeated listening, I started to appreciate them.

Overall, 2009 was another good year for rock and metal even if it wasn’t the star-studded affair that 2008 was (Crue, Metallica, AC/DC, GNR, Priest, Def Leppard, Alice Cooper… WOW!). Anyway, most veteran acts with new releases continued to deliver and newer acts stepped up to release quality music as well.

Read the rest of this entry

STEEL PANTHER – Feel the Steel

Steel Panther – Feel the Steel (2009, Universal Republic Records)

1. “Death to All But Metal” … 2:30
2. “Asian Hooker” … 4:02
3. “Community Property” … 3:39
4. “Eyes Of A Panther” … 3:37
5. “Fat Girl (Thar She Blows)” … 4:38
6. “Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin'” … 3:50
7. “Party All Day (Fuck All Night)” … 3:03
8. “Turn Out the Lights” … 4:24
9. “Stripper Girl” … 3:35
10. “The Shocker” … 4:10
11. “Girl From Oklahoma” … 3:57

Michael Starr – Lead Vocals, Backing Vocals
Satchel – Lead Guitar, Backing Vocals
Lexxi Foxxx – Bass, Backing Vocals
Stix Zadinia – Drums, Backing Vocals

Additional Musicians:
Justin Hawkins – Co-Lead Vocals (“Party All Day (Fuck All Night)”)
M. Shadows – Co-Lead Vocals (“Turn Out the Lights”)
Allison Robertson – Lead Guitar (“Party All Day (Fuck All Night)”)
Scott Ian – Rhythm Guitar (“Asian Hooker”)
Corey Taylor – Backing Vocals (“Death to All But Metal”, “Asian Hooker”, “Eyes of a Panther”)
Matt Nelson – Backing Vocals (“Eyes of a Panther”, “Fat Girl (Thar She Blows)”, “Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin'”, “The Shocker”)
Brett Anderson – Backing Vocals (“Eyes of a Panther”)
Joe Lester – Backing Vocals (“Community Property”, “Fat Girl (Thar She Blows)”, “Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin'”, “The Shocker”)

Producer: Jay Ruston

Steel Panther is a band that is a satire of my favorite rock genre — glam metal. At various points in their career, they have been known as Danger Kitty (in a popular Discover card commercial), Metal Skool and up until a few years ago — Metal Shop (under this name they self-released an album called Hole Patrol in 2003). Having signed with Universal (What? A major label signing ANYTHING that has to do with glam metal ?!), the band once again changed their name, deciding on Steel Panther. Definitely a cool glam band name, but I think I like Danger Kitty most!

Steel Panther has been an extremely popular L.A. club band for years, many big name celebrities have come to their shows and sung along with them on all kinds of ’80s hair metal songs (a number of musicians cameo on this album). They were initially a ’80s rock/metal cover band, but as you can see, they have moved on to original material. The music is spot on and the production is great. The album covers the bases well and sounds like an actual ’80s band and I mean that in a good way. This is a parody, but the music itself is never really the punchline, only the lyrics are… which are sexist, macho, filthy and perverted. Just like any good glam band’s lyrics would be!

Guitarist Satchel (real name Russ Parrish) really shines on this album and Ralph “Michael Starr” Saenz is an amazing vocalist. Plus, he knows a thing or two about hair band excess having briefly been the lead singer of L.A. Guns in ’97 and ’98. Ralph also fronts the Roth-era Van Halen cover band The Atomic Punks and throughout the album, you can definitely hear why he’s a great fit to cover the Roth tunes.

I see a lot of reviews saying this album has no staying power, Steel Panther is a one night joke, blah blah blah. Look, the lyrics are intentionally juvenile. Even after years of being familiar with some of these songs (the band has rotated them on their MySpace page for a number of years), I still think they’re funny, but I have a genuine love for the genre so if you aren’t a huge hair/glam fan, then I could see where this could get old fast for some people.

Forget the lyrics though, the most important thing is the actual music and it is great. I would put Steel Panther up against any glam band in their prime. That’s just how good this music is, which seems to be a blend of Poison, Motley Crue, Warrant, Whitesnake, Bon Jovi and Van Halen. As much as I’m defending the lyrics though, I would love to hear another album from this band dropping the intentionally humorous lyrics but keeping the same exact sound because I hate the fact that this band is getting labeled as “just” a comedy act.

Highlights: “Death to All But Metal”, “Asian Hooker”, “Community Property”, “Eatin’ Ain’t Cheatin'”, “Stripper Girl”, “Turn Out the Lights”, “The Shocker”

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